Last night I discovered that a friend of 15+ years has blocked me on Facebook.
We had a disagreement and haven’t spoken since October, so this isn’t completely “out of nowhere” – while also feeling like it is, because after all these months, why the sudden finality of not just unfriending but blocking?
I don’t really want to talk about it, there is both nothing and too much to say.
The end of a long friendship is so weird and hard and I have been full of grief for months. The end of a romantic relationship feels like it has a script, societal expectations, people know how to react to it, it’s often easy-ish to explain to people. A 15 year friendship? Nothing. No guideposts. No explanations that aren’t both more and less than what I want to say.
Today, like nearly every Friday, has been brutally slow at work, which has given me far too much time to dwell on this whole situation. 40 minutes left, then home to turn off my brain with some Warcraft. Tomorrow I have a nail appointment and a pool party to look forward to.
Onward, I suppose.